Signs of Codependency

Am I now seeking the approval of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10 BSB

According to got questions dot org,

“One result of a codependent relationship pattern is that God takes second place to people. Codependents rely on each other for emotional needs and even some physical needs rather than take care of themselves. They also lack faith and trust in God to care for their needs and, as a result, manipulate others to get what they want. Codependent people typically are attracted to one another and will keep each other stuck in a dysfunctional blind spot by telling each other what they want to hear. This way, they both can feel okay, despite the chaos their choices are creating. Obviously, people who avoid telling the truth in love have trouble recognizing their own sinful habits or need for repentance.” (https://www.gotquestions.org/codependency.html)

Wow…just reading this makes me think of how toxic a relationship can be and how easy it is to get trapped into one. This is one of the reason why broken people can’t help others who are broken. More than likely, both parties will be even more broken in the relationship due to trying to fill a void in a destructive and dysfunctional way. It’s not healthy for either party.

From a spiritual standpoint, codependency is idolatry. When we put people before God, we are committing idolatry. God says there should be no other gods before Him (Exodus 20:3). People have been placed on pedestals as gods as if they have all the answers to their problems. And sometimes, they don’t even know it. But we all are responsible for our own actions. No judgment there because I have done it too. When I realized that codependency was destructive to my own well-being and beliefs, I ended the relationship. I thank God for deliverance and therapy.

Codependency is real and emotionally draining. It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in others because they can fail or disappoint us. We have to learn to depend on God more so than others when it comes to our identity, emotional well-being, and seeking attention/approval. We may never get these things from the people who we may want to get it from, but there is One who can fill every void in our lives. And His name is Jesus Christ.

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